the glory of bette

my friend elmo and i have had a mutual love for bette midler for some time now. i do believe ellouise has too. we pretend its not serious, but i think we all know deep down that there is no love purer than our love for the divine miss m. (we of course ignore her ill-fated sitcom and horrible middle-aged romantic comedies).

some people don't like it when they are getting a free ride in my car yet are "forced" to spend the journey listening to the soothing sounds of elmo and i singing along full-throttle to the beaches soundtrack. apparently these people think bette midler is annoying and/or uncool. to these people i say "f#@*ck you" or "get out of my car".

here is a list of why bette midler rules the world:

- her name is bette, and thats kinda like my mum's name, betty, and my mum is way cool.

- she gave us 'the wind beneath my wings'. and for that alone, i thank her.*

- she also gave us ruthless people, outrageous fortune, and big business. 80s comedy gold.

- ain't noone out there that can look me in the eye and tell me that beaches didn't touch them in their special place.

- she is of the belief that a plunging neckline is the answer to everything. here, here.

- "i married a German. every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me"

- someone out there thinks she's so darn cool that they forged her name on a letter to president bush, slamming his stance on gay marriages, and circulated it on the web.

so go ahead, call me a loser. i don't care. i'm obviously hip. i like hip hop and rock music. i took drugs. i had a rebellious phase (as much as a middle-class, studious, easily guilt-tripped white girl can). and i also like bette. so what?

*you haven't lived until you've heard this sung in an arnold schwarzenegger voice by a full-bearded scottish comedian in a kilt. good times.